Musings of the Big Monkey in Red

Something also funny to pass along...

2009-11-11T05:22:08Z

The church organist was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea. As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, The young minister noticed a cute glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a COMDOM! When she returned with tea and scones, They began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and he could no longer resist.

"Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?", pointing to the bowl.

"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter?"

(Also sent from the friend in Florida)

A funny thing to pass along...

2009-11-11T05:09:32Z

Bad Day and the Dwarf

I rear-ended a car this morning. I knew it was going to be a
REALLY bad day. The driver got out of the other car, and he
was a DWARF!

He looked up at me and said, "I am NOT happy!"

So I said, "Well, which one ARE you then?"

That's how the fight started.

(Sent to me from a friend in Florida)

HA! SUCCESS!!!!!!!

2009-11-09T05:15:03Z

The only gorilla lollipops in the world have now been officially invented!! After two failed attempts, the third time WAS the charm! I reduced the water & cornsyrup by half, and behold...I now have my first 8 cherry-flavored lollipops in the shape of Ultra-Gor's head! I only need to make a few dozen more, so the individual cost of each pop will be brought down to reasonable amounts. Now, for that special child(or cute lady!) who really likes the Big Monkey in Red will get sweetly rewarded!

I want some %&@#& lollipops!!!!

2009-11-08T07:07:13Z

Ever since I saw Foofurs/Helvetica giving out little heart-shaped lollipops to girls while being Scabrous, I've been jealous and wanted to give out lollipops of my own. But not just any old pop, they had to be gorilla pops for Ultra-Gor. Nothing exists like that. Then I learn a technique on how to make your own customized pops using a silicone plastique to make your own mold. That part was the EASY part. Now I follow the recipe for the lollipop part and the darn sugary crud won't congeal and harden; it just stays gooey! The next attempt I tried to cook down the ingredients to a thicker consistency, and all it does is get dark and taste like Vic's Formula 44!! WHYYYYYYYYYYYY?????!!!!!! Just a simple friggin' lollipop to give out to kids is all I want!! A superhero never quits...I'm going to get this right or else!!!!

Somebody out there loves gorillas!

2009-10-28T04:21:32Z

This is a copy of an email message sent to me yesterday:

Greetings!

I stumbled upon your webpage and pics on a whim after looking for 'gorilla costumes' on flikr, and I was instantly impressed and quite enthralled with your character! I'm actually an avid gorilla fan, and I'm always looking out for different pics of gorilla themed costumes, though in all my travels I've never seen one stand out quite as much as yours, it's truly amazing. I look for such gorilla pics for ideas for drawing mostly; I'm a 'furry' artist and have been for quite sometime. I find gorillas are terribly under appreciated species in the fandom, and it's really lovely to see someone put so much time not only in an astounding suit, but put himself out there so much too, there's just not enough gorilla exposure out there. In fact, far as 'furry' costumes goes, yours is the first I've EVER seen, I've actually come across super jayhawk quite alot before, and how I ever missed seeing a photo of you pop up along with him is beyond me, as I'm just so thrilled to see something like that.
Another thing I adore is the 'superhero' theme; soemthing I've actually wanted to do for awhile is create my own super gorilla character. I'm actually struggling with the name, as I know of quite a few, yourself included, there's apeman & monkeyboy, gogo gorilla...well, they're too numerous to list really! So it's difficult when so many unique names are already taken to really come up with something with the same amount of 'zing'. Though, on the bright side drawing him would be alot easier then actually naming him.

I love the photos though, the gallery is marvelous, I was only saddened by the lack of drawings of your character, and I actually went as far to search DA, and FA as well…but didn’t find anything! I wouldn’t mind actually drawing him myself, if that’s something you wouldn’t mind…I’ve attached an example of my work so (hopefully) you’ll see I’m not entirely a no-talent hack fan boy whose life ambition is to bug characters he idolizes. *chuckles*

But I ramble, I wanted to e-mail you and get in touch…hope this e-mail is still valid. Your character is absolutely wonderful, as well as the fact you get out to see many conventions and events. What I wouldn’t give for the time and ambition to do the same…ah well.

All my best to you, hoping to hear back

Sincerely,
-Boz

One can imagine the 'rush' this message gave me! I wonder if this is how Super Jayhawk felt when I first contacted him about his fursuit?

Fairyland Halloween photos

2009-10-27T03:31:19Z

The Masked Mustang and lots of other Critters(Avery, Godric, Muffles, Miss Kitty, Candy Coon, Skookum, the new Polka Dog 3.0, Bob Coon, Kuro, Malochai, Hazmat, FJ as Robin hood, and the all new Fu-Ming(Helvetica) had a busy weekend at Fairyland for the Jack-o-Lantern Jamboree. The weather was unseasonably warm at 76 degrees; if you're a guest it's perfect, but for a Critter it takes a little extra fans, water, and glacier-teks! I was told from Terraluna that quite a few guests asked if the Critters would be there. It was great to see FJ back after a long absence! And Fu-Ming the modest green dragon perfectly matched the Chinese pagoda. And somehow the photos taken were exceptionally good this year:
www.ultra-gor.com/gallery/
Look for the Fairyland Jack-o-Lantern Jamboree album to see them.

More fun with Hero Machine...

2009-10-24T05:01:26Z

Still having a great time conjuring up new members of the Legion of Furry Superheroes!
"Ratbait...the Sewer Ninja" (no relation to Splinter of the TMNT!)

"Liberty Hawk"

"Emerald Fox, the Greenpeace-Keeper"

"Serious Fitness" 2004 Portfolio

2009-10-09T22:31:29Z

I knew I had it somewhere!!! Finally found the manilla envelope that contained John Nunnamacher's motivational fitness cartoons in it! They are now uploaded on my gallery under the "Art & Illustrations" album. Here's an example of John's great work:

The one titled "endurance" has a muscular horse that was the inspiration for the Masked Mustang!!

It's a job...

2009-10-05T06:04:17Z

I'm employed again, but this job is not in my field. It's honestly too embarassing to mention. But hourly it pays more than, say, something at fast food or movie theater, or stockperson. It's money, and it gets me out of the house(on an on-call basis). I'm trying to be thankful; after all, if it makes more than unemployment checks, that has to be a positive.(Maybe?)

My new hero-making toy!

2009-09-29T03:02:43Z

Hero Factory is OUT, and Hero Machine 2.5 is WAY IN! I discovered some kid's rendition of a "Walrus Man" on Flickr, and mentioned it was created with Hero Machine. This program has animal heads, so I can make Ultimate Superhero Furries!!!!! The expressions on the heads are pretty drab, but thanks to Paint Shop Pro X I can change their eyes and expressions with relative ease, plus change the background to suit the superhero. Plus there's all kinds of weapons, powers, auras, and companions to choose from that Hero Factory doesn't have. Weeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!! FUN!!!!!!!!

"ACTION-CROC", superhero gator-humanoid!

"GENERAL BENGARRI", leader of the Imperial Resistance Brigade

"WEREBORG", half cyborg, half werewolf

"PANDARR, THE BEAR-BARIAN!"

"BLASTERON", the Nuclear Ape

Two more neon projects...

2009-09-28T04:55:10Z

GROGGY FOX! MOJITO!

Original photos courstey of Keith(I. M. Weasel) Jones, from the Fairyland Membership gig.

Maleficent and the Dragon are up on Ultra-Gor's Gallery

2009-09-22T06:42:04Z

If you want to see some really impressive costumes(a couple are furry) and some neat classic muscle cars that were all at the 2009 Newark Days, go here:
www.ultra-gor.com/gallery/
The dragon was way cool!

"Momma Dragon" at Newark Days 2009!

2009-09-21T21:58:17Z

It's hard for Dennis(Mr. Dinosaur) & Sher to outdo themselves in their creative ventures, but at Newark Days they certainly DID! This year's theme was "the arts", so they conjured up an amazing "Fantazmic Celebration of the Arts", which included as the finale Maleficent and her "Momma Dragon" from Sleeping Beauty. My first thought at the sight of the huge behemoth was "Holy Cow! Kingsford's mother has been found!!"
It's always fun being a roustabout for one of their shows. I always find a way to help out with making the show run. Miss Kitty FINALLY got to use her Minnie Mouse costume somewhere besides Further Confusion. I made the suggestion to Sher and she loved it, so Minnie Mouse joined in the shows on Sunday, accompanied by the black & white Steamboat Willie Mickey Mouse. I'm sore like all getout today from three days of hauling props and wrangling, but hey, that's showbiz!

The Two Faces of Maleficent

The Cast Shot

(All this, and Maleficent was the Grand Marshall of the Newark Days parade too!)

Best remix of a song ever!!!!

2009-09-03T06:35:49Z

Today I've been so lethargic, even more than average, which is pretty pitiful. Later today I got some energy to wash my truck and do a couple of minor things. Then at around 8:00 this evening I was watching youtube clips of Michael Jackson. It reminded me of a small clip I heard recently of a remix of "Scream" which attracted my ear. So, I looked for it though it was difficult with all the remixes floating around. But I found it and I swear that remix actually made me get up and do MJJ moves right in my cramped bedroom! It's been a LONG time since I had that kind of energy brought on by a song. Listen to it for yourself:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnE7F27KgS0

If I had the money, I'd bribe the DJ at the FC dance with whatever it took to play that remix!!!!!

Guess who came for pancakes...

2009-08-31T00:02:37Z

...an awesome...superhero... cyborg!!!

(Well, not exactly. It's Smash in his incredibly cool leather motorcycling outfit that I just HAD to get a picture with. The power rangers should look as good as this!)

ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-26T19:55:57Z

Not in a MILLION LIFETIMES would I ever hope to meet such a BOGUS character in person....

A superhero who is LITERALLY full of (fill in the blank)!!!

More Neon Projects...

2009-08-25T03:33:57Z

These were made from headshots taken at Super Jayhawk's 40th birthday party:

   DAX!          FELTON!

   RIO!   (UNKNOWN)

   ARCHAEOPTERYX!

Super Jayhawk's 40th birthday party a smashing success!

2009-08-24T16:14:59Z

I'm sure others have told of all the happenings on some other medium, so I won't have to repeat anything. The photos I took are up on the gallery:
www.ultra-gor.com/gallery/
Look under the "Miscellaneous Stuff" album for the birthday photo sub-album. And here's the most "Interesting" photo of the evening:

"WHAT SOME FURSUITERS WON'T DO TO GET A SCRATCH ON DIZZY'S SPANDEX!!"

You know what's REALLY REALLY frustrating?

2009-08-19T02:00:15Z

Being qualified again for unemployment, waiting almost a month delay because the EDD had to find out what schooling I began and Aug. 12th was the earliest they could call, then they call and square everything away, and now they're late delivering the check and I am about TOTALLY BROKE, and I look in the mailbox for a check and repeatedly nothing is there!!!!!!!!!!! Whoever saw the updated Planet of the Apes movie, the scene where the evil chimpanzee goes into hysterics when he gets trapped forever in that ancient spaceship, THAT is how I feel right now! I HATE RECESSIONS!!!!!!!!!

The Masked Mustang...UNMASKED!

2009-08-12T20:17:25Z

A commissioned drawing found on Flickr, and accentuated by paint Shop Pro! (If only I looked that good out of suit!)

His eyes are even worse than "crystal meth" eyes!

2009-08-10T06:32:50Z

This mascot HAS to have the title of "Most Nightmare-Producing Eyes for Little Kids"...
I've seen some bad cases of "wandering eye", but this guy...GEEEEEEEZ!!!

Were we "nuts" to go to a central valley gig in August?

2009-08-05T16:19:09Z

Last Sunday, me(as the Masked Mustang), Miss Kitty, and two others went to Modesto to participate in the Modesto Nuts(minor league baseball) Mascot Mania. For those of you that don't know, Modesto is in the central valley and is much hotter in summer than in the Bay area. Therefore we were LUCKY to get four Critters to go, especially since the temperature at game time was 91 degrees! There were lots of other characters there from the local area teams & businesses too, including Little Caesar, Da Vinci the talking ravioli, and Mcgruff the Crime Dog! Imagine playing a kickball game with all these crazy characters in the middle of summer! Anyway, the animals lost the kickball game to the non-animals by a score of 7-6. But later we creamed them at tug-o-war and won the dance contest! It's a GOOD thing Miss Kitty & I brought two fans with us; between events all the mascots has to hide out under the bleachers in the "bunker" with NO air conditioning! It was still an okay gig; the kids were extremely friendly and the Modesto team were eternally thankful.

You can see all the fun we had on the gallery:

www.ultra-gor.com/gallery/

New high score

2009-07-21T04:27:20Z

Last night on "Bejeweled 2".......1,457,400!!!(on 'action' setting)

A BIG friend...

2009-07-20T06:35:40Z

This is a picture of me and "Mega-rilla", the wrestling gorilla, one of the largest plush toys ever manufactured, and DEFINITELY the largest gorilla plush ever made! I bought him directly form the makers back in 2006, when I had more money to spend. The red mask & accessories I put on him myself, with extra spandex left over from making Ultra-Gor. He's as tall as I am(but he can't stand on his own)! Today Minnie & I finally found enough space to keep him in the living room instead of my cramped bedroom, and I never had a chance to get a picture of me and this big ape until now. He's a good friend when loneliness or sadness comes around!

He was also the LAST gorilla of that size left from the manufacturers. He's a discontinued item.

More Neon Projects

2009-07-13T07:43:58Z

These 3 are from photos taken at the Piedmont Parade...
FORD! GRIFFINWOLF!

HOOF!

Ford's & Hoof's pics for some reason won't upload on the gallery. (Grrrrrrr!!!!)